Priority Versus Option

Hello all. I know it has been a while since I posted a blog and have been inspired this week to type up a new one. I have had many clients this week who are dealing with relationship woes and it appears to me that I am utilizing a quote quite often in these sessions. I am sure you have heard the quote "NEVER MAKE SOMEONE  A PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE THAT MAKES YOU AN OPTION". When you are with the right person it should complement not contradict your life. The healthiest happiest relationships are those in which both individuals put the other persons needs, feelings and thoughts before their own without selfish motive or desire. A relationship should be a give / give exchange with both thinking of the person they love and how certain decisions, choices, and behaviors may affect their loved one.

I see so many people living in unhappiness because they love the person so much that they put up with addictions, unfaithfulness (emotional and sexual), dishonesty, and being put on the back burner in hopes that the person they are with will soon love them as much as they love their partner. A healthy relationship is one in which both walk side by side and support each other though hurts, adjustments, and transitions and grow together in happiness and celebration of who they are as a couple.

If you are making someone in your life a priority and they are making you an option, or you find yourself being a convenience to them and there is an ebb and flow in them showing you through words and actions what you mean to them then you need to stop and ask yourself why am I trying so hard to be a priority and to be loved in a healthy way. When you are with the right person you will still have ups and downs but you will never doubt what you mean to them because even through the rough times they will be right beside you holding your hand as you both encourage each other on to the future. You should not have to beg to be a priority, you should not have to beg to have your thoughts and feelings respected, and you should never have to question if you are an option to them or not.

I tell women and men frequently if you find yourself chasing after someone or begging to be loved the way you desire to be loved then you are probably with the wrong person. The right person will not turn his or her back on you and if they have you might need to turn away from that person because I guarantee there will be someone out there who will always be facing you with open arms and could never imagine turning their back on you or life without you. This blog of what to look for in the one is not a fairy tale or fiction. This blog  is about being able to recognize unselfish, pure, genuine, committed, faithful and long lasting love. Again I repeat the quote "NEVER MAKE SOMEONE A PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE THAT MAKES YOU AN OPTION".